She Comes First
A quick, practical look at She Comes First—what it teaches, how readers rate it across platforms, and the most common praise + critiques.
by AudiobookHub Team | 2025-12-25
A Practical Guide to Pleasuring a Woman—What Readers Love and Where It Falls Short
What She Comes First Is About
She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman by Ian Kerner is a skills-first, anatomy-and-attention approach to partnered sex—written in a "do this better" tone rather than a romance/relationship narrative.
Its core pitch is simple: prioritize her pleasure, slow down, communicate, and treat it like learnable craft, not guesswork.
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Ratings Snapshot (Different Platforms)
| Platform | Rating | Notes |
|----------|--------|-------|
| Google Play Books | 4.6/5 | Based on 141 reviews |
| Audible (audiobook) | 4.1/5 | Based on ~4.3k ratings |
| Goodreads | ~4.2/5 | Editions pages commonly show ~4.2 avg with thousands of ratings/reviews |
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What Readers Tend to Love
- Practical, confidence-building structure: Clear "how-to" framing instead of vague advice.
- Reassuring mindset shift: "Attention + patience + feedback" beats performance anxiety.
- Communication emphasis: Many readers like that it normalizes talking and learning.
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Common Complaints (The "Can't Get Through It" Reasons)
- Tone/style mismatch: Some people bounce off the "instructional/manual" voice.
- Feels dated in places: Parts can read like an older-era relationship/sex advice book (language, assumptions, examples).
- Too technique-heavy: If someone wants emotional intimacy / connection-first writing, it can feel clinical.
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Recent "Heat" (Is It Still Trending?)
It's less "new-release viral" and more evergreen: it keeps resurfacing because it's frequently referenced in modern sex/relationship conversations and recommendation lists—including podcasts discussing oral-sex skill-building and "how-to" intimacy resources.
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Related Reads on AudiobookHub
If She Comes First resonates with you—or if you want a different angle on intimacy and desire—these two are frequently recommended alongside it:
Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel
What it's about: Explores how to sustain passion in long-term relationships. Perel argues that too much familiarity can kill desire—and offers strategies for maintaining mystery and eroticism within committed partnerships.
Rating: 4.5★ (484 reviews)
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Come Together by Emily Nagoski
What it's about: The science (and art!) of creating lasting sexual connections. Nagoski offers practical, research-based advice for improving sexual well-being—particularly in long-term relationships where one or more partners may be experiencing low libido.
Rating: 3.7★ (62 reviews)
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The Bottom Line
She Comes First is a practical, no-nonsense guide that treats sexual skill like any other learnable craft. If you want direct, actionable advice without romantic fluff, it delivers. If you prefer emotional depth or a more contemporary voice, pair it with Perel or Nagoski for balance.


